E.P.A. Designates Forests “Enemies of State.”

I don't know whether to laugh or cry.

I think I'll just boil over with rage.

E.P.A. Designates Forests “Enemies of State.”

Today the Environmental Protection Agency’s chief Martinet (official title) Lisa P. Jackson (formerly of Wendy and Lisa, and Lisa Lisa and Cult Jam), has issued orders that Carbon Dioxide, which is what you are breathing out right now, is a deadly pollutant.

Many individuals have been taken by surprise by this official ruling of the Obama administration, including one Terence Wheeler, of Macon County, Georgia, who claims to have been breathing C02 out and in for many years without noticing that he was being poisoned.

But criminalization of this deadly poisonous toxic pollutant that is responsible for all acts of terrorist weather, as well as AIDS, is just the beginning for EPA super-agent Jackson.

Said Mrs. Jackson to the packed hall of reporters, “While it is well known, and I quote, that ‘climate change could reduce income from farming and fishing, possibly driving some women into sex work and thereby increase HIV infection,’ we must take an even larger step than preventing people from having sex, to stop global warming.”

No, says Mrs. Jackson, “We’ve got to clean up our acts, and that means going through our closets and finding all the dresses that don’t fit, and whether we like it or not, or think that one day we might squeeze into them again…what was I saying? Oh, yes. We’ve got to throw out those old clothes and old relationships, and start anew.” Said agent Jackson, with a mouthful of hostess devil’s food cake.

“And that’s why we’ve got to cut down the forests of the world.” She told a stunned, but quickly compliant audience.

Following the conference, the EPA issued a formal declaration, explaining that forests were now an ‘Enemy of the State.’ From the briefing:

“Because trees and plants take in C02 and turn it into oxygen, they must be considered enemies of the state, for co-dependently facilitating global warming by not preventing us from stopping production of C02.”

So now the Environmental Protection Agency has made the bizarre, yet predictable move of categorizing all plant life as enemies of the state. Declaring all plant life as an enemy of the state is bizarre because this sounds more like an idea for a satirical comedy skit. And predictable because I'm not very surprised. The Environmental Protection Agency has turned into the State Protection Agency. It is quite insincere and disingenous for anyone to take seriously the government's concern for the environment's welfare. Why? Well, because the government's only concern is its self-existence and its continued application of tyranny over free peoples. The government's concern for the environment only extends to the point where it perceives a threat level something or someone poses to its criminal existence.

EPA Chief Lisa P. Jackson is in clinical psychiatry terms: a lunatic.